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I'm not angry.
I'm not pissed.
I'm just hurt.

I know I was bitchy on the phone but I was only joking.
I said,

"Ooh, I gotta go. Gotta call the rest also. Most of my cash balance is gone and I've only called you. Ish, my whole world doesn't revolve around you,y'know :p Bye suckaaa"

I joke.
I tease.

I only tend to do it with people I'm comfortable with.
Only with the people I truly open my heart to.
Only with the people I tell my secrets to.
Only with the people I love spending time with.
Because I know they'll laugh along with me.
Because they know I'm kidding.
Because they really know me.

I thought you did too.

I am aware that I hurt people's feelings without knowing it.
I'm sorry I offended you.

But I called you.
I bothered to call you.
Even though I was a million miles away.
You were the first one I called because I had to hear your voice the most.

I was running all over the mall just to find a friggin' phone card to call overseas..
I called you, from a million miles away, across the south china sea.

When I heard you say that you were pissed because I was acting like a bitch earlier, after the first phone call,
I just broke.

Tears were welling up,
and my voice was breaking.
That's why I didn't say much after that.

You asked me if I was pissed, I wasn't.
My hati just pecah-ed.

I cannot believe you broke my heart while I was a million miles away.
I thought I was stronger than that.

I apologize, I admit that I was a tad bitchy and annoying, but couldn't you just be happy that I took the time to call you?
Instead, you shoot me down.
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I’m sorry I called,
I’m sorry I cared.